In the past many years, I have been praised by all sorts of people, "wow you are so capable!", "you are so smart", "you are very talented!", etc. Unconsciously, I have labelled the good side of me, the "good" self.
But no one is perfect. At the same time, I have been receiving negative comments of all kinds, "you are too direct.", "you are very demanding.", "you are so messy!", etc. Unconsciously, I have labelled the other side of me, the "bad" self.
Does this story apply to you as well?
I don't know why but we have been raised in an environment that "bad" self is bad, so bad that we need to destroy it! change it! get rid of it!
And we don't just do this to ourselves, but also everyone else. We see the "bad" self in our kids, destroy it!; we see the "bad" self in our partners, change it; we see the "bad" self in our colleagues, get rid of it/them!
But does it work? How much energy has been drained away from fighting against the inner enemy?
"In order to transform something, first stop trying to change it." This is the basic principle of Positive Sponsorship. Is it a rather shocking concept for you?
My greatest pleasure to conduct a workshop on Positive Sponsorship, a topic that people rarely touch on, to a group of audience from all walks of life, highlighting the origin and principles of Positive Sponsorship, which has nothing to do with money, and of course some practical ways to be a good sponsor!
The live demonstration clearly has shown that with the repeated use of a simple coaching question, we could help someone to find the positive intention of a "bad" behaviour and redirect him/her to find alternate ways to fulfil it. How magical!
Promoting inner potentials is not to get rid of the "bad" self so that the "good" self will live happily ever after, but to bless and sponsor the "bad" self so that we can truly be accepted who we are and given a space to awaken our true potential and talent.
"Every behaviour has a positive intention." Well-said.
Stay Open, Flexible, Receptive and Curious. Be a good sponsor of yourself and others to truly promote inner potentials!
"Until somebody has been seen and blessed by another person, they don’t fully exist”